As I sit here and reflect on the past year - I am amazed at the moment's that God has had his hand on me and my life. At this very moment one year ago, I was sitting in the critical care unit at Sumner Regional Medical Center and trying to wrap my head around what was happening. At 12:48am, on September 17 I received a phone call asking if D was home. My response was let me go check. When I got out of bed, I heard the doorbell ringing. I was definitely not prepared for what I saw next. As I rounded the corner from my bedroom, through my kitchen, and into my den - when I turned to the right, I saw D laying on the couch almost unconscious. I will leave out the rest of the gory details, because honestly... they are just not important. As I knelt beside her and called 911, I could not believe what was happening. How could she attempt to take her life? What was going on, and how had I missed the warning signs? As the police showed up, and then the ambulance - I was in shock. K was standing in her door watching everything in awe while I was trying to wrap my head around the whirlwind. The paramedics put her in the ambulance, and K and I got in the car and followed them to the hospital. We went into the ER, and the nurses told us we would not be able to see her due to her being unstable. What??? How at the lowest point in a person's life could her loved ones not be around her to let her know that we care??? As I sat in the waiting room and made phone calls, K and I began to pray. That was the only thing we could do...we were completely helpless! The nurse came out (as promised) to give us an update. When she looked at me, she said, "Are you Lori?" I said, "Yes." She said, "I'm not sure if you remember me or not, but I was your replacement at Moore and Associates when you went on maternity leave. Since I know you, come on back with me." Y'all... I had not seen this person in over 17 years and she remembered me!!!
I went back to the room to see D, and we sat and cried and prayed, and dealt with the situation the best we could (again, leaving out the gory details). As they got ready to move her to CCU, the original nurse told us we would not be able to go with her - that they would contact us at a later time. When transport came, the kindest man looked at me and said, "Are you ready?" I told him that I was under the impression that we were not allowed to go and he said, "Sweetheart, you have been through enough." Y'all... a sweet man that I had never known took mercy on us! Before we were moved to CCU, I had been told there were strict rules, and no one was allowed to stay under the circumstances.. Guess what?? We got to the room, and got D settled and this sweet nurses aide, said, "Would you like a bed so you can stay?" It was about 7:30am on September 17, and I had not had sleep in over 24 hours - I was tired and exhausted and couldn't even think straight. The nurses were changing shifts, and when our daytime nurse came to introduce herself - I could not have been more pleased. She said, "I'm Wendy... I will be your nurse today." I don't know how to explain what happened next, except it was God. This sweet woman who I had not known 5 minutes hugged D and I, and became our biggest advocate over the next few days. Our nurses aide, Jessica, sat down on her knees and gave us her testimony.
On day 3, we were told that D was being moved to a stabilization unit in Cookeville, and that she would have to go by police escort to get there. As we met with the mobile crisis unit, the social worker came out and said, "Would you like to drive her?" All I could do was cry, "of course - I would like to drive her." We were released
that day, and we made the drive to Cookeville. For the next few days... I made that drive during visiting hours, and D and I talked and she constantly had her Bible that my mom had given her. We brought her home, and that is when the tough stuff began. None of the past year had been easy, but I am so thankful that when I look back - I can see God's hand in ALL of it! There were doors opened for us that should have never been opened, and kind people made exceptions that should have never been made. I know that I serve a mighty God, who has a plan for ALL things!
These are the basics of my story, and if anyone is struggling and would like to hear the rest - I am willing to share. I cannot explain everything that happened over the weeks that followed - there is no explanation except for God! Today, this sweet girl is thriving and has had a great year. No one has ever said it was easy, but it is worth it! I cannot express the gratitude and thankfulness for those who came and sat at the hospital, brought food, prayed with us, and simply loved on us and my sweet kids!
While, our story has a happy ending, I am aware that some do not. September is Suicide Awareness Month... if anyone you know has talked about or considered suicide - do not take it lightly. Suicide is the silent killer. Please, if you or anyone you know EVER needs help, needs someone to talk to or just to pray with - I am always here!
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