Each year young women all over the country start the recruitment process to join a sorority. They are all looking for a place they can call "home." While this seems like such a simple process, it can be very stressful - not only on the girls, but on the mother's. The girls who are legacies have an added stress of wanting to be "chosen" for at the same sorority their mother, grandmother, or sister's were a part of and the mother, grandmother, or sister is holding their breath while waiting to hear what is happening. Did they get invited back? Did they get a bid? To someone who does not understand Greek life this may sound crazy, but for those of us who have lived it - it is perfectly normal.
This week one of my sweet sister's survived the recruitment process with her daughter. Although, her daughter did not accept a bid, and the process did not turn out the way we had hoped - I learned a lot. When I went through rush in 1989, my sister was a senior and in a sorority. After the second round during rush week, her sorority dropped me. Although, I knew they may not be the prefect fit for me - I thought the world was coming to an end. As the week progressed, I knew exactly where I felt at home and where I belonged. The fall of 1989, I made one of the best decisions I have ever made and that was to pledge Kappa Delta. We all want our daughters to find the type of friendships we have. We want them to experience the bonds and the unconditional love. We simply want what is best for them. But as a mother, I have to remember that one day my sweet daughter may find all of those things and more somewhere other than Kappa Delta.
It has now been over 25 years since I pledged, and these ladies are the ones I still lean on to this day. We have been through marriages, divorces, deaths, births, and everything in between. We are there for each other and love each other unconditionally. We still get together as often as possible and laugh until it hurts. If you look at each of us - we are completely different in every way. But yet, we are still the best of friends. In my heart, I know God put us together over 25 years ago, because He knew we would need each other later in life.
As you navigate the recruitment process with your daughter, friends, and family -, I think it is important to remember that it is not necessarily the letters that are worn across your chest. A sorority is about the standards and values you live by every day. A sorority shows you the importance of giving back, and teaches you about helping others. It is not about paying for friends, it is about finding a group of women who will support you, motivate you, and challenge you to be your best every day. For me, it is about striving each day to be "that which is honorable, beautiful, and highest."
Growing up as the youngest of 3 kids myself, I know exactly what it was like to be the baby of the family. But... I was not the only girl - I had an older sister with a brother in the middle. As I have watched my sweet daughter grow up, there is a BIG difference in being the baby and being the baby AND the only girl! Not only is she the baby in our home, she is the youngest of the six grandkids that live here in good 'ole Tennessee. So... with those things in mind, as her birthday is quickly approaching - here are a few things I have learned. She is a PRINCESS! And, for the love of all things holy - do NOT, and I repeat do NOT try to tell her anything different. She is and always will be the only princess around. When she was a baby, I was concerned she may never walk. When you have a big brother who is seven years older and willing to carry you - why would you? When they were little, and I would ask J why he was carrying her the response was always, "that's what big brothers do." Point taken... I let him carry her and sure enough, she did eventually walk. When the kids were asked to clean their rooms, my boys started right away so they could get finished and go outside. Not the Princess, she waited until the boys were done - then with the sweetest voice and smile ever asked for help from her "bubbies." Of course - they cleaned her room! She loves breakfast in bed! For the first six years of her life, she did not get out of bed until she has a "fruit bar and cup milk" - that would be a NutriGrain bar just to clarify :) She is also the most loving, kindhearted, sweet spirited little girl (I guess not so little anymore) that I have ever met. She is the most accepting person and loves everyone just as they are, and accepts them for who they are. She does not have to fit in to the crowd - she marches to the beat of her own drummer. She is one of the funniest people I know, and definitely has always kept me on my toes. She is her biggest critic, and is a perfectionist. At the age of 14, sat down and documented her long term and short term goals. She is a Jesus lover. When she loves you... she LOVES you - with everything in her. Most of all... she is mine! As we get ready to celebrate her birthday this weekend - it is hard to believe that she will be 15. I could not be more proud of the young lady she is becoming. She continues to surprise me, make me laugh, and make me proud on a daily basis. I definitely could not ask for anything more!!
So... it has happened. My kids are growing up and I do NOT like it... not one bit! This has been a week full of high school registrations. K is now a sophomore and C is now a SENIOR!! J is living and loving life in Colorado, and I am missing him like crazy! How did it happen?? I blinked, and they have grown up! As I walked through the halls at SCHS this week, there are so many memories for me and my kids there. Watching the interaction of my kids with their teachers, and their friends makes me one proud mom! Listening to teachers and coaches as they stopped me to compliment my kids and their behavior in class, and hearing the stories they tell just made my heart happy. They are each individuals who have their own personalities, and stand strong in what they believe. They do not waiver or stray, and do not let others influence their opinions. I could not be more proud of everything they have accomplished in their high school careers and in their lives so far. They are kind, compassionate, caring, fun-loving, free-spirited, Jesus loving kids who continue to make me proud each day! They are definitely my pride and joy and biggest accomplishments in life!
