'Tis the season... the season of celebrating Jesus' birth, the season of giving, and the season of spending time with family. It is also the season of missing your loved ones when they can't be home for the holidays. As a single mom, I have been very lucky to always have my kids with me for every Christmas. As an Army mom, I have been very fortunate to have my soldier home every year for Christmas...until this year.There have been lots of holidays and special events over the last 3 years...there have been 12 birthdays (just in our immediate family), there have been multiple holidays every year (Thanksgiving, Mother's Day, Father's Day, Labor Day, Memorial Day, July 4), there have been proms, high school graduations, college move-in days, K moving into her first apartment - all of these things have been missed by our soldier. Yes - we know this is what he signed up for, and we as a family support him unconditionally but...it is hard. This year will be the first Christmas in 3 years he won't be home. While I am very thankful he is on U.S. soil - he's not in Tennessee. He is 3,901 miles from home.
Tonight, as I was finishing up Christmas shopping to get his box in the mail first thing tomorrow - as I was picking up a few last minute things...I was standing in the toy aisle with tears. There are traditions that families have (even if they are silly) that when a piece of the puzzle for that tradition is going to be missing - it is hard. Do you keep doing it? Do you skip a year? Do you try to make it work almost 4,000 miles away? There is no right answer...so, you do your best to make the decision knowing that it will be hard - knowing that a big piece of your heart is going to be missing either way. Most days I have this "Army strong" thing down...tonight was not one of those nights. Tonight I miss my soldier something fierce. As I was wrapping presents, and I was having my pity party (and yes, it was a pity party) - the phone rings, and it was my sweet soldier FaceTiming me. Then, I remember that things could be worse. I remember just why I am so thankful for technology that allows me to see his sweet face from so far away. Then, I remember that although he is not home - he will be home soon and so many others will never get the opportunity to spend a holiday with their loved one again. So... I put on my big girl panties, finished wrapping presents, packed his box, and have everything ready to be shipped tomorrow. I know I will survive. I know I will worry about him being so far away, but - I also know his active duty time is about over and I he will hopefully be home in the next 6 months. So...I thank God that he is safe, I say a prayer for all the other military moms that are not going to be with their loved ones and I suck it up and get back to the "Army strong" thing.
