My people and dating...

This is probably the most real thing that I have posted in a while.  There is something to be said about dating in your 40's. And, quite honestly...I'm not sure that I have many nice things to say.  When you decide to date post divorce, there are many factors that come into play. First...you have your kids.  Now - let me say...I love my kids more than anything in this world.  But, when it comes to someone  hurting me - they are not forgiving.  They will be the first to say that they want to see their mom happy, but they will also be the first to say that "if you hurt my mom - then I will hurt you." They also have no problem voicing their opinions to the other person.  You see, this is one of the beautiful things about being a single mom - you get ALL the love and protectiveness from these humans that love you more than anything (even if they hated you during the middle school and high school years).  Second...you have your friends.  If you are lucky enough to have the friends I have - they will either love the person you are with with their whole hearts or they will hate them forever for you when you break up (even if you think there might be a chance you can forgive). They will say all the ugly things you are thinking, but just can't seem to vocalize. And, for the record - when my friends love...they love and when they hate...they HATE! Third...you have your family.  Now, this is where the balance comes in.  When do you introduce them?  Or, do you at all?  Do you just wait to possibly say one day, "hey, I'm getting married," because you know that announcement would have a lot less questions than having to explain a break up.  Oh, and for the record...your family and friends are probably the best judge of character around!  They are the ones that know you the best, and that truly have your best interest at heart. So...there's that. 

All of this to be said...dating isn't all bad. Every once in a while there is someone that comes along and makes you realize that it's okay to love again and they give you that hope that one day you may find your person. They make you realize that there are some really good guys left out there if you take the time to get to know them. And, even if they don't end up being your Prince Charming - they may end up being one of the best friends you could ever have.  Or...you may realize that you already have your people and you are surrounded by them every single day.  They are the people who always have your back, that will show up at the most unexpected moment and know what you need more than you do yourself.  These are my people...the ones I love with my whole heart!

Loving BIG

There are many things that I think of when it comes to 2018.  There have been many changes, many things to celebrate and many heartbreaks.  There have been personal accomplishments at work and at home, and I have loved watching my kids grow.  When I think back over the past 12 months, and I think about my family and friends - words cannot even express the love and gratitude I have for each of them! As I have been watching social media this week, and seeing what word to choose for 2019 - this got me thinking...what would my word be?  Well - my word is BIG. The definition of the word big is 1) considerable size, extent or intensity and 2) of considerable importance or seriousness. Why is my word BIG...well, let me tell you.  


1. We have a BIG God. When I think about all of the things in life that we go through, there are some things that are simply unexplainable.  We may lose loved ones, we may have a crisis with our health, or we may have issues with our kids and loved ones.  When things happen...we may question Him and wonder why - but we may be asking the wrong questions.  Even in times of trial, we need to ask what God is trying to show us. Regardless, of what we go through - we come out on top, God has our back.  Why? Because we have a BIG God. In Psalm 147:3-6 we are told:


 "3  He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. 4  He determines the number of the stars; he gives to all of them their names. 5  sGreat is our Lord, and abundant in power; his understanding is beyond measure. 6  The Lord lifts up the humble; he casts the wicked to the ground."

2. When you love someone - you should love BIG. How many relationships do you go into not giving your all because you don't want to be hurt? Well, if you enter every relationship/friendship scared that you will be hurt - think about what you may be missing out on. Whether it is a friendship, a relationship with a family member or friend that needs to be mended or with a significant other - you should always love BIG...even if it means you may get hurt along the way. What would happen if you went into every relationship loving the other person the best way you know how?  Not only should we love each other big...we should love our God big. In Luke 10:27, we are told:

"Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy strength, and with all thy mind; and thy neighbour as thyself."

So, going into 2019... I am going to love my God and my people BIG!

Happy New Year y'all!