Explain it - don't express it

This morning, as I was sitting and waiting on the kids to get ready for school.   I was scrolling through Pinterest wasting time.   As I was scrolling, I came across a quote - it stated, "Explain your anger - don't express it and you immediately open the door to solutions not arguments."  I immediately began thinking - what if people actually explained their anger instead of expressing it?  How many friendships would be saved?  How many relationships might be salvaged?  How many families could have been kept in tact?  What if people actually sat down and talked about the issues, instead of lashing out?   Anger causes us to act in ways we normally would not - it causes us to yell, scream and curse.  And afterwards, when you are finished expressing all of your anger - what happens?  Normally, I feel guilty. I know I said things I shouldn't have - I know I can never take those words back.  I think about everything the Bible says about anger, and am drawn to James 1:19-20.

“Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. Human anger does not produce the righteousness God desires.” (James 1:19–20 NLT)

We are told we should be "quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry." How many of us remember these words in the heat of the moment? When you are really angry with someone, is listening the first thing you want to do? Sometimes, no! The first thing you do is to start talking, trying to prove your case. You try to prove they are wrong and you are right. Sometimes, we all need to take a step back from the moment, explain to the other person what it is we are upset about and then simply listen!